In All Thy Sons Command: A Case of Gender Neutrality

O Canada!

Our home and native land!

True patriot love in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,

The True North strong and free!

This is the beginning of the Canadian National Anthem. The same anthem that is causing quite the buzz among Cannucks this week. We were proudly singing this at the top of our lungs through out the Olympics; because we did get 14 Gold Medals if anyone was keeping count… or right, Guinness Book of World Records was! Canada: Most Gold in the Winter Olympics Ever. But as soon as the cauldron was extinguished and Parliament went back to work… this gem of a topic comes up. Our national anthem is not gender neutral (no way!) and its time we go about fixing it. Oh, neutrality… is that the same neutrality that got our Women’s Hockey team publicly chastised for breaking out the bubbly on the ice after their gold medal victory… or the neutrality when our men’s skeleton gold medalist walked through Whistler with a PITCHER of beer in hand and then was whisked away to go see Oprah?

Honestly, one could pick apart just about every line in the anthem if they wanted to, and explain how its not neutral, equal or inclusive…

O Canada!

Our home and native land! (not everyone who’s Canadian was born here… so not so inclusive of newcomers eh!)

True patriot love in all thy sons command. (the sons… and daughters? androgynous)

With glowing hearts we see thee rise, (glowing hearts… what about those with cardiovascular disease)

The True North strong and free! (there’s always a debate about 1. what is true north geographically speaking and 2. is it our North… or Russia’s?)

From far and wide, (are you calling us FAT?)

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. (I’m a bit of a peacenik so I don’t see myself guarding anything)

God keep our land glorious and free! (why does God get special mention, not everyone believes the same way (or at all)

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. (again with the guarding)

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. (ok… its repetitive I know… but you see what we do there right)

Let me put it to you this way. Of the 14 times our flag was first, and all the times in between, when we broke out into song to show our pride, not once did Quebec complain about inclusiveness, or the First Nations people ask for an apology, or the majority of female Canadians feel left out. Not once. That says something for unity to me. WE were all SO DAMN PROUD that we agreed on something for once… Canada Rocks! So honestly, take your parliamentary committee and put it to more pressing matters like child poverty or something. If anything was brought up in bad faith it was this topic at this time. Canadians are riding a high right now, I’ve seen Team Canada Jersey over business suits and on premature infants… To tell us that the words we sung so proudly need to be changed. That’s just uncalled for.

Call me an anti feminist but I thought ‘in all thy sons command’ was put in to be supportive of our troops in the World Wars… wouldn’t it actually be disrespectful of our veterans to remove it now?

Tuesday’s Child is Full of Grace: Except in Public

Monday’s child is fair of face, Tuesday’s child is full of grace, Wednesday’s child is full of woe, Thursday’s child has far to go, Friday’s child is loving and giving, Saturday’s child works hard for a living, But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day Is bonny and blithe and good and gay!

This is one of those rhymes that stuck with me from childhood and I like to reflect on it from time to time, unlike that rhyme about the girl with the curl in the middle of her forehead and the stupid Brownie Pack that taunted me with it *shakes fist at her Brown Owl*… I digress.  I was always curious about which day I was born on, and what exciting fortune was placed upon me because of the day I was brought forth into this world. So one day I found a phone book that had calendars dating back to the year I was born. I was really excited, just like Christmas I thought… What’s it going to be? Will I be pretty? Will I be rich? Here’s what it said to me: Tuesday… I got stuck with Tuesday.

“Tuesday’s Child is Full of Grace”

The self centered world of a child is a funny place to be and I thought, hey… I was BORN on a Tuesday! That means its pretty special to me, my mother and the rest of the family at least right? What about Bruce my first kiss… I was special to him too right? And my best friends and my pet fish Francis who I fed religiously except when I forgot… So Tuesday would be MY DAY. And then I promptly forgot about it until all the older cousins in my family started popping out the wee ones and that rhyme came around once again. But I was a little older and a little wise ass wiser.  I developed a theory. Tuesday is the least appreciated and least respected day of the week. Monday, everyone HATES Monday. Its the start of the week, but no body likes it. It gets respect at least. Wednesday is Hump Day, if you can just make it past Wednesday you’re almost there! Thursday is *almost Friday* and Friday IS Friday! The weekend of course is self explanatory, Saturday and Sunday and NO SCHOOL! But Tuesday, who ever says good things about Tuesday… the stock market crash of 1929 was Black Tuesday and we know how well that went! So again I thought wow Tuesday was the day I was born. I will find the good in Tuesdays if its the last thing I do. I decided to adopt the Pollyanna approach and look at it as an entire week before Monday came again, and I was born on a Tuesday so that’s something to be thankful for. Its the least rushed day of the week, unless you work in the computer industry in which case every second Tuesday of the month is Microsoft Patch day and its a 24hour+ working day for some schmucks.

Okay so I decided to own Tuesday. That’s great, niffty, gee willikers even!  But what about this ‘Full of Grace’ business? I know the prayer from church ‘Hail Mary, Full of Grace’… it couldn’t possibly mean that. I mean… I … I’m an illegitimate child for Pete’s Sake! So I check in with my good friends Merriam and Webster to see what they had to say:

Unmerited divine assistance given humans for their regeneration or sanctification, a virtue coming from God OR  a charming or attractive trait or characteristic, a pleasing appearance or effect

Well, since we’re scratching the divine off the list let’s address the second option shall we.

Charming or Attractive trait or characteristic. To me that means graceful, and I am anything but.  I can be funny, charming witty and so on… but honestly sometimes I act like a down right fool. I trip upstairs, I slip, I burp… I make a sound like a barking seal when I laugh too hard.  Honestly, I feel like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality. I’m learning and trying to improve but I know I’m still an unrefined girl incognito.

I am the girl that pumped her own gas in an evening gown on her way to the formal…

Something to Talk About: Peanut Gallery, Gossip Mill & Water Coolers

Get comfy, I’m going to tell you a story. Not so very long ago I moved away from my entire family and came to a city that I, and my provincial compatriots were brought up to hate  despise, loath, mock for all eternity and not like very much. I came to Toronto,  also known as the ‘Centre of the Universe’ (not directly of course, but that’s another post). My first job was in a call centre for a big icky financial corporation, I had to take a subway and a bus to get to the call centre which was an entirely new experience for someone who used to live in spitting distance from work! On this subway/bus commute I heard a voice that had a familiar accent. This voice belonged to Mr Man. Fast forward about 4 years from the day on the bus. Mr Man and I are together after all that time we met up again and things fell into place.

We work on the same street but quite a number of city blocks apart. At our respective water coolers the gossip queens gather. Today, I believe they honed into the same frequency because they brought up how Mr Man and I will soon be a Mr & Mrs.  We find it funny that we’re getting the hints (our families also tune into the frequency on occasion). My coworkers are more of the peanut gallery persuasion and drop hints that I’ll be the ‘next’ one of the office to have a baby but they’ve been saying that for 2 years. I’m used to it now, but when you are happy and talk about the significant other at work you give them Something to Talk About. I’m just glad we no longer work in the same office as cubicle buddies… it would be like Gossip in Stereo!

And as a follow up to the Hopechest gift, it was all but confirmed that was the purpose of the flateware: To help you gather things to set up your house… because its hard when you are ‘just starting out’. I have lived away from home for coming up on 5 years now. So I guess that ‘starting out’ means with Mr Man. For those in the know, that’s 21 Days and Counting until Operation Meet the Fockers.

Tim Horton’s: A Cultural Reality

I work with new immigrants to Canada in Toronto. This commercial makes me cry every time I see it. I’ll get a client every now and then who is in a very similar situation being separated from their family and getting excited and prepared to see them. I hear different things all the time about something that they love about our country, Tim Hortons, the grocery stores, the transportation, the candy, the snow, the freedom or the space. Any number of what to me would be mundane things, they are so enthusiastic to share with their families. I once found a cartoon in the newspaper that had a sketch involving Tim Horton’s. The first guy says ‘I’m a New Canadian’ the other guy says ‘new?’… ‘yes, I’m Canadian, just new at it’… so the other guy gives him a cup and says ‘here have a double double’…. the new Canadian has a tear in his eye and a thought bubble that says ‘sniff, sniff. Today I am one of them’…. and this commercial is very similar to that. Something so small and insignificant, resonates so deeply. For those of you who aren’t Canadian. Tim Hortons is our national Coffee Chain. they serve donuts and tea and coffee and soups, sandwiches and now breakfast. A ‘double double’ is a coffee with two cream, two sugar. The standard order. We identify with it, when we’re away from it we get excited. Even a few episodes of  ’How I Met Your Mother’ feature it, one directly and another one not so much, they use a Tim’s coffee can as an ashtray on the roof… VERY Canadian considering there’s only one character who is a Canuck and they are in NYC. But I’ll leave you to watch this one. Let me know what you think!

(FYI the commercial is totally filmed in Toronto, the store is Honest Ed’s and the airport is Terminal One at Pearson…)

Operation ‘Meet the Fockers’: T minus One Month and Counting

courtesy of my BFF

I woke up this morning a full 15 minutes before my alarm and thought it odd, then I recalled my dream and thought to myself…. OH SWEET BALD HEADED BABY JESUS…it’s ONE month until I bring Mr Man home for the dog and pony show that is Meet the Family.  In my dream I had arrived home, and it was day two of Operation MtF and I had some how allowed my love to be left with my Aunt. The chickenbone Aunt. This same aunt gave Mr Man homemade sleeping pants for Christmas… they were made of flannel and were PROUDLY Canadian and VERY large. I told her he was six foot two, I think she thought that was ’round the middle’. Needless to say should we ever decide we both want to wear them we can, at the same time since we both can fit in them… yes we’ve tried this. I think she has a bit of a crush on him, and she’s never met him. My family has responded very positively toward the idea of him. They inquire after him, and send regards with each phone call or email. I know I shouldn’t be anxious. He’s very excited to fly home and meet my family. He knows I’m nervous, and assures me with every chance he gets that he’s VERY excited to go home. Now he’s going to meet everyone (save for the one cousin + family in the Boston Area and my sister + family in Dartmouth). And by everyone I mean,  aunts, uncles, mom & stepdad, cousins, nieces & nephews, “siblings”, in-laws, pets, quasi-family and the BFFs. That’s a lot of pressure, and a lot of people to see in just 5 days.  But since I have received the ‘Happy Birthday, put this in the Hopechest‘ gift, he got a Christmas card in Ukrainian (btw he is Ukrainian that’s another post never fear) and some gifts; here’s hoping he’s in like Flynn already! This got me thinking. How does everyone else deal with the meet and greet?

You’ll get the update for sure on how this all goes down. Maybe even a photo or ten! *crossing fingers*

Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down… I Figured Out What to do for Lent!

Today is Ash Wednesday, a meatless day… since I am practically vegan as it is I have that covered, so I can devote time to sorting out what I’ll do for Lent. As I mentioned in a previous post I wanted to work towards my New Year’s Resolution of being a better friend. To that end, I’ll be constructive by using my 40 Days to get back in touch. I’m going to do my best to have more meaningful contact with the people in my life. Not just a ‘likes this’ on Facebook, or a Retweet on Twitter; but genuine contact. A trendy Lent thing is to avoid social media, however, I live apart from my entire family and a bulk of my good friends. So its how we connect. If I can’t talk to someone I’m going to get in touch in any way possible… Smoke Signals if need be. Now this doesn’t exactly reach beyond my comfort zone in the same way that last year’s Lent did. However, it will require me to not lapse into apathy about being out of touch like I generally do. I always manage to find a reason why I didn’t call instead of reason to call. Not that one needs a reason necessarily to talk to their family, but motivation I guess is the better word. They are my family, they don’t change much and they are always there… Enter apathy stage left. Now Lent discussions from a lapsed Catholic such as myself is a bit hypocritical I’m sure, though I was mentioned on another blog discussing Lent by Gareth Hughes, a Pastor with the Church of England, after he stumbled upon my other post, and I find that fascinating all on its own; I never imagined I would get anyone other than my best friend reading and commenting.  My mother was right, it takes all kinds to make the world go round… and if someone across the pond working for the big guy upstairs can find my words helpful I guess I’m walking in the right direction! My Sociology of Religion professor described the different religions (and atheists) as such: “we’re all going up the same hill, we’re just taking different paths”.  Ashes to Ashes!

Baking in Birkenstocks—> Vegan Brownies

So at the 11th hour (literally at 11pm) I decided I needed something to indulge my sweet tooth and made some migraine/tummy friendly brownies. (Carob powder not coco, and dairy/egg free). They turned out lovely. When I get on a baking kick… Lord help my hips! The ladies at the office will not be impressed with me tomorrow. I bring everything I bake into share, so I don’t eat them all alone. The recipe:

VEGAN BROWNIES

Ingredients

2 cups flour

2 cups sugar

3/4 cup coco powder

1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1 cup water

3/4 cup applesauce

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/4 teaspoon almond extract

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Grease 9″ X 13″ baking pan

Blend dry ingredients in a large bowl.

Add all the wet ingredients and stir well.

Spread in pan and bake 25 minutes or until the top is dry and the sides pull away from the dish slightly.

Allow to cool completely, and cut into squares.

Lent… to fast, abstain or just chill?

This is Shrove Tuesday. I didn’t eat pancakes because I can’t eat dairy or eggs it pretty much defeats the purpose of indulging before the big fast. SO I ate fancy tofu and rice… can I get a whoop whoop? No? Not even a woo? Alright, moving on!

So I figure with Ash Wednesday steadily creeping up on me I should think of something amazing, spectacular. But I will regroup first. I was raised Roman Catholic, with all the bells, whistles, communion dress and confession. Along with this came an overwhelming sense of Guilt. Now I know they didn’t mean to hard wire it in me, but being raised RC and having about one eighth Jewish, about a quarter Scottish heritage and the rest Irish… I was predestined for guilt (see what I did there… I alluded to my Presbyterian roots which we like to pretend aren’t really there). Last year I decided on my fasting on a whim, off the top of my head I pulled “no Fear, no Guilt”. For 40 Days I did my best not to be afraid of things that would normally make me nervous or make different choices (I was regressing a bit into shy girl mode and this helped a lot) I learned to swim which was a new year’s resolution, and jumping into the deep end was assisted by the no fear! And the no Guilt. Well I was able to bring myself to analyze my relationships and find out where the drain was. Work, Friends, Family, Home life. Needless to say, allowing myself the liberty to be so critical was amazing. I found where my stress was, did something about it. Now I’m 25lbs lighter, I can jump in the deep end and not panic and I am the happiest I have been in a very long time. I think that’s what Lent is supposed to be about. Abstaining from the things in our comfort zone, mine was hiding behind guilt and fear and not fixing things. I am better for it.

This year I would like to accomplish something along those lines. It takes 21 days to make something a habit. So if I can figure out what good habit I want I will use this 40 days as a goal. New Year’s resolutions are so open ended and undefined with 365 days to work on it. I resolved to be a better friend. I found out during the ‘big change’ that I have some pretty spectacular people in my life so I want to work this year to make sure they know it. I just have to let it come to me in time. I’ll get back to you. But I think if I can keep it in that parameter I’ll be much better off than just ‘giving up Tim Horton’s’ or ‘avoiding fried foods’….. so cliché!

Baking in Birkenstocks—> Cupcakes

Almondcream Frosting

Last night I made cupcakes. The first time I’ve done them completely from scratch. I have to say, not as tough as I thought it would be. I mean I have done one or the other but not both batter and frosting. I believe they turned out well, they got a ‘you rock’ out of a coworker and another asked me what store they came from. I’ll take that as a compliment. Just as my frosting was getting to the ultimate state of fluffiness… the handmixer died. Frosting killed my mixer. Death by sweet sweet frosting (it was on its last legs anyway… I over use it)

So if you want a ‘Deadly Delish’ Cupcake recipe please try:

Cupcakes:

2 cups (500 mL) sifted cake & pastry flour

1 cup (250 mL) granulated sugar

2 tsp (30 mL) baking powder

1/2 tsp (2 mL) salt

1/2 cup (125 mL) butter, softened

1/2 cup (125 mL) milk

2 large eggs

1 tsp (5 mL) Pure Almond Extract

Almond Buttercream frosting:

1 cup (250 mL)  butter, softened

5 cups (1.25 L) sifted icing sugar

1/2 cup (125 mL) whipping cream

1/2 tsp (2 mL) Pure Almond Extract

Preparation:

Cupcakes:

In large bowl, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder and salt. Using electric mixer on low speed, mix in butter, milk, eggs and almond extract; beat on high speed until smooth, about 2 minutes.

Spoon into 12 paper-lined or greased muffin cups, about three-quarters full. Bake in centre of 375°F (190°C) oven until toothpick/tester comes out clean, about 18 minutes. Transfer to rack; let cool.

Almond Buttercream Frosting:

In large bowl, beat butter until light and fluffy. Alternately beat in sugar and cream, making 2 additions of sugar. Beat in Almond Extract. Frost and sprinkle liberally immediately!

Hopechest or Happy Birthday?

Does this say Hopechest or Happy Birthday?

I received a beautiful set of flatware for my birthday. A 65 piece set in a wooden chest from my Aunt and Uncle. This is not the exact set out of respect for the flatware’s privacy. I think it is a great gift, I truly appreciate it, makes me feel more grown up than other years. However this strikes a chord with me. Girls of a certain age back home tend to start collecting housewares like this and it accumulates in a Hopechest (an actual chest, a bottom drawer, rubbermaid tub or the closet) I haven’t actually received this type of gift before. I did get the initial bits and bops of household things when I moved out on my own for the first time, like the personal size George Foreman Grill, an iron, some wicked oven mitts and the occasional towel set for Christmas. This time is different. I’ve been living on my own for a few years now, established my own little space. I’m wondering now that I’ve started to muse over it…Are my family members trying to tell me something. Am I getting to ‘the age’ where this sort of thing is expected in the lead up to certain life events? I know my coworkers for some time now have been dropping the ‘when will the wedding/babies’ happen but that’s normal for ladies to ask. Mr S has been getting similar questions at his place of work as well, so its not a gendered question to have asked. I look forward to other goodies in the mail during my birthday month, as I said before I live away from my entire family so most things come by mail or are saved until I visit, sending/receiving something ‘on time’ is a big gray area in our family. So long as I don’t start getting fertility drugs or chapel veils in the mail we’ll assume they just wanted me to have something nice for my special day.